it still hurts

when you loose someone special in your life,
it takes a while for the hurt to go away.
tomorrow marks the one year anniversary of my grandmother passing
and i'm not sure the hurt is ever going to go away.

despite missin' her somethin' fierce, 
i find immense joy in the fact that 
she is with her Savior in heaven.

today i went through some photos with my mom.
it was sweet to remember my grandma and 
how many different hats she wore.

a daughter, sister, and cousin

a friend

a mother

 a hard worker

 a beauty

 a family woman

grandmother 

 babysitter extraordinaire

adventurer

more than any of these things, 

i remember my grandmother's love for Jesus.

every chance she got, she would share about Him.

she didn't care if you had the same faith or not,

if you were eight or eighty,

or if you spoke her language.

 her bible was littered with markings

from years of studying

as painful as not having her cheerful laugh

and convicting spirit on earth,

i can't wait to be reunited with her one day

as we worship God together for all eternity.

Eleanor Dorothea Jacobs

September 1, 1916-April 9, 2012

Easter: the day after

easter is my favorite day of the year.
without Christ rising over 2,000 years ago,
life would look and be totally different.
my life, your life, everybody's.

one of my easter traditions is to read through 1 corinthians 15.
it's a basic argument for why the death 
and resurrection of Christ is paramount.
at the end, paul reminds of the victory foretold in isaiah:

"'Death is swallowed up in victory.^'
 'O death, where is your victory?
    O death, where is your sting?'"

as amazing as easter is with its focus on such amazing truths,
it becomes like so many holy days:
remembrance on important realities 
that seem to not impact our lives after a few days have passed.
 
i read this section of scripture anew yesterday, with my focus extending to verses 57 and 58:

"But thanks be to God, who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ. Therefore, my beloved brothers, be steadfast, immovable, always abounding in the work of the Lord, knowing that in the Lord your labor is not in vain."


we have victory because of and through the risen Christ!
and while we rejoice and reflect on that, let us not forget to act.

i pray in this renewed season of victory in Christ, that i would work abundantly for the Lord,
being steadfast and immovable.

and i pray the same for my brothers and sisters.
may we "press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus!"





cincerely,


cindy

fighting the good fight

^{"But godliness with contentment is great gain, For we brought nothing into the world, and we cannot take anything out of the world. But if we have food and clothing, with these we will be content. But those who desire to be rich fall into temptation, into a snare, into many senseless and harmful desires that plunge people into ruin and destruction.}  

 ^{For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evils. It is through this craving that some have wandered away from the faith and pierced themselves with many pangs.} 

But as for you, O man of God, flee these things. Pursue righteousness, godliness, faith, love, steadfastness, gentleness. Fight the good fight of the faith. Take hold of the eternal life to which you were called and about which you made the good confession in the presence of many witnesses."

1 Timothy 6:6-12

in this new season, the Lord is impressing upon me 

the need to fight this good fight.

in my life, it seems so easy to just go about my day, thinking on the Lord and His goodness and on His cross and simply on Him.

yet my life is not much different than it was a year ago. 

i go to work, i try to sleep,  i go to church, i beat my missions drum, 

and well, that's about it.

i've become so discontent with my life and 

haven't really been able to figure out why.

until this last week.

i started reading "forgotten God."
while the concept scares me, i know it's true.
in essence, mr. chan says that the (western) church often lacks power 
because it lacks the Holy Spirit.
i'm not talking about a second baptism or anything like that, but the church all too often lacks the working of and the reliance on the Holy Spirit.

i had to spend some honest time before God in those moments.
how easily i forget that the Holy Spirit is present, active, and powerful.  
how quickly i forget to fight the good fight, knowing and resting in the power and faithfulness of the Holy Spirit.

i pray in this coming season, i would fight the good fight,
being "strong in the Lord and in the strength of his might" (Eph 6:10).
i pray that i would take up the whole armor of God, remember my only weapon is the sword of the Spirit, (although called the "word of God," it is powerless without the working of the Spirit).
i pray that others would join me in this fight, and that i could join others as they battle against our flesh, this world, and the schemes of the enemy.



cincerely,

cindy  
 

happy reminder