this has been a really hard week. my nursing friends and i were discussing how we feel like we don't have restorative sleep, feel as if we want to sleep all day, and are in a constant state of alert. this is never good. never. we have two clinicals a week and the clinical group i found myself in seems to get screwed all the time, particularly this semester. from multiple clinical instructors, to no home visits and no guidelines and hard grading, to saying we don't critically think, it seems as if anger has been my primary response.
and i hate it.
truly loathe it. God has called us to rejoice in suffering and to praise His name through circumstances through trusting and relying on Him. i'm not doing that. i'm trying to do things in my strength and i am failing miserably. i'm teaching children's church on sunday and this just happens to be the topic. ironic or God ordained? hmmm.
today, i found out one of my professors has cancer. suck. for the last two weeks in class, we've been learning about alternative therapies, and the last two weeks we've had a "reiki" person/master/crap-artist teaching us about energy. basically, it's hinduism with Jesus thrown in. i don't care if she has believes in some energy crap, (well, i do, but that's another blog), but honestly, why must Jesus be distorted through this belief? why must Jesus' name, again, be defamed!?
these are my stressors. i want them gone. i the peace of Christ that passes all understanding to once again overtake all that i am so as to reflect Christ! i want to love even when it is the hardest thing to do! and i want to see Jesus exalted through this craziness called nursing school!